DO YOU EVER SIT THERE AND WONDER LIKE??? HAVE PEOPLE ACTUALLY HAD CRUSHES ON YOU AND YOU NEVER REALIZED IT LIKE WHAT IF THEY HAD THIS BURNING PASSION FOR YOU BUT NEVER SAID ANYTHING FOR WHATEVER REASON AND INTERNALLY SCREAMED OVER YOUR EXISTENCE AND ALL THE LITTLE THINGS YOU DID JUST LIVING YOUR LIFE WOW
I know that I did post something like this a long time ago. I do think some things a way bit too much to a certain extent. I wonder if I had told Mina, Kathy, & Katrina L about my feelings about each of them separately of course I wonder what would of changed if anything at all. For Mina it was love at first at sight. I used to annoy get on her nerves for the longest time. I don’t really know if she knew that I really did like her. I had almost all of classes with her in middle school with the exception of maybe 2 or 3. She was the only one was really after despite me liking Katrina and Kathy for different reasons. I should of approached her during the summer of our senior year or ask her brother for some advice on handle the situation. As for Kathy she has did wonderful inviting personality that made me really like her from the beginning. The thing about Katrina she was friends with both of them and I tried use her to get to both Katrina & Mina for different. After my failed attempts with Mina and giving up Kathy for some reason I turned my attention to Katrina. She was the back-burner to start with. Even though I really didn’t get to really know Rayna was much as I really wanted to in school. I really should have paid more attention to her than to hold to the past (Mina) Rayna is so sweet, kind, warm person. Even though I never got to know her that I really wanted. For some reason I turned my attention to Torrazzi of all people. I think in my own opinion Torrazzi was a similar version of Mina but I did not go after her like I did Mina. I should have really thought of about Johnna because I knew her longer than most people and would most likely of had a good time chilling with her. She was doing other activities that I didn’t have time for. In looking back I should have asked either Johnna or Marvice to prom instead of who I did ask. My logic at the time was all the cute ladies were taken. I ‘m not saying that Johnna and Marvice aren’t cute there are attractive I thought they would of being taken already. I wonder would Johnna’s answer would have been if I had asked her since I have known her at the time for 6 years. Pretty interesting to say at least
Moving on to the last 10 years and moving forward. From this point it was really interesting time for better or worse. I had the pleasure to meet some of the nicest people that I still consider good friends to this very day besides some people from the past and I know who they are. I knew Miranda from being neighbors in where we live but in passing in a sense. I got to know FGP after the fact in a few years even though we work in the same area. Katrina C is a very quaint, outgoing person and that is one of the nicest things about her besides her personality. The very person that I really did like at work was Jane more than FGP came much later. There were like twins in a real sense (BFF). Then for some odd reason I headed toward Jeanelle and Nitsa It came down to Jeanelle for some reason even though I was older than both of them. There was something about Jeanelle that I do like. I still can’t put my finger on it and maybe I never will at this point. In between Nitsa & Jeanelle there was Morgan. I consider myself & Morgan kindred spirits in a good way because we were the only 2 african-americans in our area maybe that is the reason for that one time after that 1 night she wanted to hangout but I had other plans . To this day I do regret that I didn’t spend any more time with her besides work. Something’s may have changed if that had happened. As years went by I think I decide grow closer to FGP because she was the only I really did like for some time even though she going out with someone at the time. Even though there is a 6 year difference in age. Age is nothing but#. She really was a helpful in many ways. She does know what those ways are. I evened went out to support her in quest in which she won. I believe I was the only besides her family to show up at her event. She was so happy that I did show up for. I would think she would do the same for me if I had something as important as she did.
In between all this I had to a great opportunity to several internships at San Diego 6. I had a wonderful time there. The staff there was so nice and I had the pleasure to go out on numerous live remotes with various people. I learned so much from the news anchors .One highlight for me was going to Petco Park on opening day and being on the field. Doing an internship really made want to pursue a degree in media for the longest time. The one thing that I had wished that I did better was to interact with more people than what I did at the station maybe something would have happened if I did. I do thank Kelli for taking a chance on giving me an opportunity to work at the #1 station in the city.
I was at Keiller and I had this crush on Mina during the fall of this year and I tried to actively pursue this but she rebuff every advance toward her . I truly wonder what would of happen if I had told her that I was crushin on her.
do many things this year
Some things I do wish that I could change. (Prom) take Johnna or Marvice instead of the person that I did , Mina (see above)
Just about to start my 2nd year in GA . Met some cool people like Katrina C, Laura, Racheal M, Juile F and others
my last year at SW ( so happy ) so glad that I left . I miss some people not all over them.. Hate dealing with fake ass people
Even though this the end of the year. This really did not dawn on me until now for some reason. Go Figure.
Back in 92 I was in coma in the hospital for the 1st part of the year and I had to learn how to walk,talk & eat again. I had met Johnna the previous September and I have known ever since.
So that Fall I went Keiller I had classes with Mina, Kathy, Gebren, Elisha, Michelle S, Katrina L, Lakeshia and others I was so thrilled to meet so many good looking females for a change. For some reason I had a majority of classes with Mina -sans ASB & Homeroom. That was an interesting task in itself because I had a crush on both Katrina L & Kathy for 2 different reasons but not Mina but I rolled with what I had.
1. Best way to keep a secret? Keep it to yourself. 2nd best? Tell one other person-if you must. There is no third best.
2. There is no such things as a coincidence
3. two ways to follow. First way they never notice you. Second way they only notice you.
4. It’s better to seek forgiveness than ask permission.
5. If someone thinks they have the upper hand , break it.
6. never apologize , it’s a sign of weakness
7. Never be unreachable
8. When the job is done walk away
9. If it seems like someone is out to get you , they are.
10. If you geel like you’re being played you probably are
11. Always be specific when you lie.
12. Never take anything for granted
13. Never go anywhere without a knife
14. Don’t ever accept an apology from someone who just sucker punched you
15. Clean up your mess
16. Sometimes you’re wrong
17. Never trust a woman who doesn’t trust her man
18. Don’t believe what you’re told. Double check
There is something that I will always regret until I ever find that person. Hopefully that past regret will mean something to that certain person. I personally don’t expect anything to come of this situation at all. I rather lay everything in the open so that person would know what I would want to tell her instead of being by shy about it. Every so often I wonder what would have happen if I had told this person my ulterior motive about her instead of doing of what I did. I had several opportunities’ to talk this lovely person but I was distracted on those occasions by several different things and/ or people. This person was my very real 1st crush despite everything that I have thought about in the past and in the near future. She will always be someone that I will always think about in a very positive way. In my eyes she was perfect 10 in every way. She has a great personality, pretty eyes. What is in the past can’t change that but sometimes I do if I had to change that circumstance I wonder what would become of that miss opportunity. In hindsight this was my biggest mistake in my personal/professional life.
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